God’s Grace Has Never Been Lacking

　　Time certainly flies. Three years sped by in the twinkling of an eye, and now I have finished my Master of Divinity Program. In retrospect, when I was chosen and called by God, I kept bargaining with Him over and over again until I responded to consecrate myself to Him. I resigned from my job and picked up the schoolbag, stayed up late in order to finish the homework assignments, and tore myself down to be rebuilt by the love of God. In the midst of all these, there had been laughter and tears, blood and sweat. Looking back, I must confess that this has been a path of grace!

Difficulties in Learning—Overcome through God’s grace!

　　Returning to study in school is by no means easy for anyone who has been working for quite some time, not to mention that in the past we used a pen to do the homework but now people use the computer instead. It is not widely known that I was not good at the Chinese input method that required typing Chinese words into the computer. I needed to spend two to three times longer than my fellow students just to type the Chinese words into the computer. Often I had to work all through the night just because of my typing problem. I remember the first class assignment was one on the New Testament, requiring 7,000 to 10,000 words. I heard that the teacher was strict and he might order the student concerned to do it again if it was found to be unsatisfactory. Just imagine, if ten hundreds of words need to be retyped, I would have to say: Alas, all is lost! Praise the Lord that by means of the comforting words, encouragement and prayers from teachers and fellow students, I was made instantly enlightened and understood: I came to understand the teacher’s requirements and happy to see that my mastery of the Chinese input method gradually improved (despite not doing well, I could still manage in haste). Soon afterward, the assignment could be done faster and faster and the course grade was getting better and better.

　　Of course, I had come across a time of defeat: I worked very hard but the academic result was not satisfactory. However, I was thankful for God to allow me to experience defeat so that I could discover and accept my own limitations. Time and again He reminded me to be humble. On the ministry path, what a minister puts into his work may not yield an outcome directly proportional to his input. In the old days, the prophets and even Jesus also demonstrated how they were faithful to what they were entrusted under these circumstances. Therefore, I had to firmly remember these experiences, learning to be faithful and humble.

Impacts in Ministry—Resilience through God’s Grace!

　　With increasing knowledge in theology, I could have greater reflection on matters but that brought about more impacts. In these few years, President Cho and our teachers always brought up some issues and encouraged us to treat people around us with hospitality, to put the holistic gospel into practice, to care for those poor in spirit, and to learn the lesson of forgiveness. These teachings are what we should always bear in mind. To let these teachings enter into our ears does not seem difficult, but to enter them into our hearts—to engrave them in our hearts and carry them out all through our lives is not at all easy. Having been a Christian for more than twenty years, I find in astonishment that the cross we Jesus’ disciples are to bear is fairly heavy. The cross of Christ is a price to be paid, is to face persecution, is to turn our generation upside down! In order to be a faithful preacher, we are caught in a dead end, and there is no turning back! Jesus himself demonstrated this for us. The blood and tears of our Baptist forefathers in the old days left their imprint in history. Even today in some corners of the world there are still many Christians who suffer all sorts of misery for the sake of their faith.

　　An in-depth reflection is sometimes contrary to the attitude I have been holding in my life and therefore that brought with it great impact on my faith. But the grace of God helped me to resist that impact. He reminded me again and again: All I need is to hold fast to God’s promise and with hope and trust that the kingdom of God will ultimately be fulfilled. I am just a simple human being and as a created creature of God, I cannot infinitely bear the needs of the “other”. However, I can strive to be a road sign by directing people toward our Lord Jesus Christ. Only this powerful one can be the goal of man’s ultimate search.

Financially Lacking—Solved through God’s Grace!

　　Back to school, one of the most annoying problems was financing: from “having a stable income” to “having no stable income”, could I actually afford my living expenses? Although the school fee, the biggest expenditure, was borne by my church, how to solve other daily expenses such as meals, transportation fees, textbook fees? For food, I deliberately skipped certain meals and so I did not often go to the canteen at lunch time. As for transportation, I intentionally chose to walk and preferred to spend more than half an hour just to wait for a means of transport that provides transfer concession. For textbooks, I willfully went out searching, borrowing from the library, or from senior fellow students, or even from our teachers. Therefore, I did not buy many books.

　　On the outside, it seemed that my life was fine but what if suddenly I needed medical fees, short term mission fees, or I failed when applying for a work grant? Honestly speaking, I cried a great number of times! These were the unspeakable situations. Yet, God saw it. God saw the need of Abraham and granted him a son. Likewise, He also saw my need and granted me grace. For example, I suddenly received an offering from brothers and sisters in Christ, being granted a scholarship, even having teachers and students take the initiative to lend me money (finally I did not need to borrow from them)! Jesus once asked his disciples, “When I sent you out to preach the Good News and you did not have money, a traveler’s bag, or an extra pair of sandals, did you need anything?” “No,” they replied. (Lk 22:35) When I have graduated today, looking back, I can also call out loudly, “I lack nothing!”

　　To be honest, taking theological studies is hard work but there is joy because I study for the Lord, my God! As long as we are sensitive to the work of God, we can always marvel at the grace of God which can be found everywhere. “O Lord, I give you thanks, for your grace has never been lacking!”